And in a split second, she’s 33 years old[er]. She’s not one to say “old” too much in regards to people because she just doesn’t believe the hype. Yes, you get older, that part she fully understands. Her issue is, there has been no official or numbered (spiritual or otherwise) age of becoming old. It sounds exactly how it sounds, all caps with no letters.
This year is special and difficult, only because she feels and sees the growth within herself. Special, because she is learning to embrace every moment openly and with a true heart. Difficult, becuase growth is hard and it hurts sometimes-most times.
She’s no punk, and working hard is not something she runs from. A mother of black children of both genders, married to a black man, a black female veteran and even worse in others eyes, a talented black women. In America, hurt is something she’s become numb to. As much as she wants to say this is about all of those things, she can’t and won’t. This time around, it’s about her.
Her thoughts and their purities. Her actions in their importance. Her love in its depth. Her laughter and smile are welcoming and joyous. She revels in her truth because its hers and hers alone.
Selfish, huh? Hello no, its not. She’s allowed to say when she needs more than moment for herself—self care should never be neglected. After being everything to everyone else, it only seems fair that in return she gets her time to be everything to herself. Everything to herself includes authenticity in who she wants to be going forward and in who she is in this very moment- harsh realities and all (mental, physical and spiritual). Her gains have always out weighted her losses and more than enough.
She is She, and she is her. She is Chapter 33. One of gratitude, choice, truth, replenishment, nourishment, intense love and honor. Chapter 33 is special, transformative and ready for the journey ahead.
These are the thoughts of her, Chapter 33.